I had a conversation with my mum today and we got on the topic of giving. She confessed that she and my dad sometimes worry that their kids are selfish a.k.a too tight with our money. Instead of jumping in to defend myself I let her talk through it.
I’m glad I did. My parents are insanely generous. If you invited them to dinner and told them to just bring themselves, they would bring a hostess gift package and a dessert. I use gift package as often times it will be multiple related items wrapped together and it looks divine. In comparison I would just bring a bottle of wine.
Once my mum finished, she concluded that when I walk her through my rational it makes sense and I seem to have found some middle ground. To be honest, this is an area I consistently struggle with. I want to be thoughtful but I also don’t want to spend money on items that won’t be appreciated.
Recently, I’ve found myself just trying to be more thoughtful. While my parents spend equally on everyone I spend on those I care deeply for. Last weekend we went to a cottage with friends and I purchased all the groceries for 5 people while ML did the bulk of cooking and menu planning. This week I chauffeured a friend and bought her ice cream, for another I purchased and made gifts for her kids.Tomorrow I’ll host my parents for a turkey dinner just because turkey was in sale and I’ve never made one.
So while I don’t take extravagant gifts to the homes of acquaintances I do make an effort to not take my loved ones for granted, to ensure that they feel appreciated.
Do you and your family have differing views of generosity?