Anxiety Rears It’s Head

I’ve previously written about my anxiety on this blog and a in a bit more detail here. In the last few weeks my panic has been climbing in all aspects of my life. I visited my therapist and we worked on a plan for my next few weeks.

Since I know I’m not alone I thought I’ll share some of the things that I’m going to be doing to build my resilience.

Take vacation

Really take it next week! Relax rather than fill my days with to-do items. I realized that I am nervous about not having plans so I’m going to create a list of fun ideas for me to pick from rather than my usual list of should do.

Make having fun…fun

I’ve been scheduling fun which has been a bit stressful. For example I was attending a local craft night but it meant rushing home, changing out of my work clothes, eating quickly, getting to the event in the nick of time, HAVING FUN, rushing out to pick up ML, heading home to sleep. Doesn’t sound very fun does it?

Her recommendation was that I work with my moods and lifestyle.

Language!

I make fun plans with the best intentions. Tonight I’m heading out to dinner with friends and I’ve been looking forward to it. Last night I realized that the time I recommended we meet doesn’t actually work easily, it means that ML and I will need to do some creative juggling to ensure we both get where we need to go today.

Once I realized this I began getting stressed and began thinking things like: “How stupid to not realize that I should have booked it later or suggested another date!” or “This afternoon is going to be so busy I won’t get anytime to take care of stuff for tomorrow.” Notice how that language doesn’t sound like I want to see my friends?

Once I caught these thoughts I have worked to put some positive ones out instead:

  • ML is super easygoing about this, I should listen to him and not worry about juggling.
  • All I have to do for tomorrow is select my clothing as tomorrow’s lunch is taken care of.
  • It’s going to be fantastic to see them! I can’t wait to catch up

Emotional Bank Account

This is the big overarching thing and what’s gotten me in trouble. The idea is that our emotional resources are finite. I’ve been worried about finances, family, work and friends as well as feeling busy and rushed. As you can see my attempts to refill with ‘fun’ hasn’t quite panned out.

By taking a proper vacation, enjoying myself rather than rushing to and from ‘fun,’ and speaking kindly to myself my emotional account should move to the black.

I’ve slowly started this journey. This past weekend I ‘scheduled’ Sunday to be a fun day i.e. no chores! I spent the day watching movies, playing with Bunny, hanging out with ML and it was fantastic. Even when we did end up doing a few errands it was relaxing.

What do you do to relax?

 

 

 

 

12 thoughts on “Anxiety Rears It’s Head

  1. It is wonderful you are willing to share your personal life. Many people experience similar issues and often have nowhere to turn. Your honesty and willingness to share your life will greatly help others. I am so proud of you.
    Stay healthy and happy!

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  2. I can totally relate to how you are scheduling fun and talking to yourself. It leeched any enjoyment out of thentime, I was so worried about the details. Sadly, I am not a spontaneous person! Lol.

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  3. I read and also take baths with soothing music. I too also decided a family vacation is in order. Although planning one can be a bit stressful the outcome will be worth it.

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  5. Oh I relate to every. single. thing.
    Look at me, I’m taking a whole damn year off to relax and I am still filling my days to the brim with TASKS TO DO. I schedule Fun as well and stress more about having to work around the Fun. I’ve been writing about having “Me Time” a lot on my blog and that’s been my antidote that I’m starting to learn… to recognise that okay, maybe I don’t need as of certain types of much “Fun” as other people or I have “Fun” in other ways, so I should just stop trying to fit in with others and do what’s right for me. And what’s right for me is to have an unscheduled day with absolutely nooothinnngg planned. It doesn’t sound fun. Yet it’s so much more enjoyable for me and I fill up my Emotional Bank Account.

    Hey it’s pretty reassuring to hear that the things I’m discovering are the same things your therapist is recommending. All it takes is money hey. Either having the money to see a therapist, or having the money to not work so you can muddle your way through these things haha. No no… joking aside, it takes willpower to work through these things and actively work on it. And you are! Well done!

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    1. That is rough! Mine has a great deal to do with not having internal measures for success (or setting unrealistic measures) and perfectionism.
      My finances definitely play a role in that but writing about them here, and sharing in others’ experiences, has helped a great deal.

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